Relationships · Original Saucy Dates survey
Cheating and forgiveness: would she end the relationship?
What counts as crossing the line in a relationship? Our survey of 613 women explored whether they would end a relationship or forgive a male partner for different behaviours, from looking at another woman to having sex with her.
The answers reveal different boundaries and some striking UK US comparisons. We have retained every original count and percentage below, with updated commentary to help you interpret the findings. These are people’s stated responses to hypothetical situations, not the odds of what your own partner will do.
Key findings · All survey figures · UK and US comparison · How to interpret the research
About the survey and this update
The original survey recruited 613 women through Saucy Dates, its Facebook page and its Twitter followers. This is an archived survey, not a newly conducted poll. The original article does not provide fieldwork dates, country sample sizes, demographic breakdowns or weighting information.
Not every question received 613 answers. The global response totals are 613, 597, 572, 566, 548 and 538, in the order shown in the table. Each percentage belongs to that question’s responses. The UK and US percentages are retained as published; subgroup counts are unavailable here.
This self selected audience should not be treated as representative of all women, either worldwide or within a country. The questions offered “dump” or “forgive”; real decisions can involve uncertainty, time apart or forgiveness without continuing the relationship.
What did women say they would forgive?
Looking: a divided response
53.9% of UK respondents said they would end the relationship over their partner looking at another woman. The US figure was 39.0%.
Touching: a majority chose to leave
70.1% of UK respondents and 58.1% of US respondents chose “dump” for touching another woman. Globally, the figure was 61.8%.
Kissing: 69.6% chose “dump”
Across the global responses to the kissing question, 398 chose “dump” and 174 chose “forgive”: 69.6% and 30.4%, respectively.
Sex: 25.1% chose “forgive”
For a partner having sex with another woman, 135 of 538 respondents chose forgiveness. The remaining 403, or 74.9%, chose to end the relationship.
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Why “looking” and “touching” need a conversation
Globally, 55.8% chose forgiveness for looking at another woman, compared with 38.2% for touching. That contrast suggests the respondents did not treat every behaviour alike. It does not tell us exactly what they imagined when they read those words.
A passing glance and sustained, deliberate attention can feel very different. “Touching” also leaves context unstated. The survey did not distinguish those situations, so it cannot define the right boundary for a couple. Discussing expectations is more useful than assuming that your partner shares your interpretation.
Kissing versus sexual contact: a small difference, not a loophole
One unusual finding in the original report was that slightly more respondents chose forgiveness for a partner receiving a hand job than for kissing: 31.1% versus 30.4% globally. The same direction appeared in the UK results (27.7% versus 27.3%) and the US results (32.0% versus 31.7%).
These are small differences. The available information does not establish statistical significance or explain why people answered that way. One possible interpretation is that some respondents attached particular emotional meaning to kissing, but the survey did not test that explanation.
Neither result offers permission to cheat. In both questions, a clear majority of respondents chose to end the relationship. A partner’s boundaries cannot be replaced by a percentage from a survey.
Were American respondents more forgiving than British respondents?
In this sample, US respondents selected “forgive” more often than UK respondents in all six comparisons. The difference was largest for looking: 61.0% in the US compared with 46.1% in the UK. For having sex, the figures were much closer: 24.5% and 23.2%.
The results do not establish that one nationality is more liberal, reserved or loyal. Recruitment, sample composition, interpretation of the questions and other unrecorded factors could affect the comparison. Use the country breakdown as a description of these answers, not a stereotype about someone you date.
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Global cheating and forgiveness survey results
Original counts and percentages are reproduced below. “Global” means all responses included in this survey, rather than a representative worldwide sample.
| Question | Dump | Forgive | Dump % | Forgive % | Share this result |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Your man looking at another woman? | 271 | 342 | 44.2% | 55.8% | |
| Your man touching another woman? | 369 | 228 | 61.8% | 38.2% | |
| Your man kissing another woman? | 398 | 174 | 69.6% | 30.4% | |
| Your man receiving a hand job from another woman? | 390 | 176 | 68.9% | 31.1% | |
| Your man receiving / giving oral sex with another woman? | 408 | 140 | 74.5% | 25.5% | |
| Your man having sex with another woman? | 403 | 135 | 74.9% | 25.1% |
United Kingdom versus United States: original figures
These country percentages describe the respondents to each question. The original article did not publish the underlying country counts.
| Question | Dump (UK) | Forgive (UK) | Dump (US) | Forgive (US) | Share this result |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Your man looking at another woman? | 53.9% | 46.1% | 39.0% | 61.0% | |
| Your man touching another woman? | 70.1% | 29.9% | 58.1% | 41.9% | |
| Your man kissing another woman? | 72.7% | 27.3% | 68.3% | 31.7% | |
| Your man receiving a hand job from another woman? | 72.3% | 27.7% | 68.0% | 32.0% | |
| Your man receiving / giving oral sex with another woman? | 78.4% | 21.6% | 74.7% | 25.3% | |
| Your man having sex with another woman? | 76.8% | 23.2% | 75.5% | 24.5% |
What these findings mean for your relationship
The useful takeaway is that expectations vary, and physical intimacy was a relationship ending boundary for many respondents. If you are starting to date someone, talk about exclusivity rather than assuming you both mean the same thing. Agree what is acceptable before a disagreement becomes a breach of trust.
Consensual non monogamy is different from breaking an agreement. The question is whether everyone involved knows and freely agrees to the arrangement. Secrecy or pressure cannot substitute for that agreement.
If trust has already been broken, a survey cannot decide whether you should stay. Forgiveness is a personal choice, and it does not require continuing a relationship. Equally, deciding to work on a relationship does not mean pretending nothing happened. Give each other space to make an honest decision without using these statistics to demand a particular answer.
Frequently asked questions about cheating and forgiveness
What percentage of women said they would forgive cheating?
It depended on the behaviour described. In the original global results, 25.1% of respondents to the sex question chose forgiveness, compared with 30.4% for kissing and 55.8% for looking. These are results from a self selected survey, not population estimates.
Does looking at someone else count as cheating?
People draw that boundary differently. The question did not specify the kind of looking involved. Talk about what feels respectful and acceptable in your own relationship rather than relying on the survey to set a rule.
Does forgiving someone mean staying together?
Not necessarily. The survey used two simplified choices, but in real life someone may forgive a partner and still decide to leave.
Are these new survey results?
No. This article updates the explanation around an archived Saucy Dates survey while keeping the original figures intact. Fieldwork dates are not available in the original article.
Using these statistics in the press or on social media
These answers describe hypothetical boundaries. For a separate look at what respondents said they had actually done, explore our survey of 45,526 people about relationship lies and cheating. The two surveys ask different questions and should not be treated as matching samples.
You are welcome to reference these findings with attribution to Saucy Dates and a link to this article. Please describe them as an archived survey of 613 women recruited through the site and its social channels, mention that responses vary by question, and avoid presenting them as representative of all women.
The share links include context and take readers to the relevant figures. If you need further information or would like to discuss commissioning a new survey, contact us. Explore more research and relationship topics on the Saucy Dates blog.